The Hidden Impact of ADHD in Women

ADHD in women and girls is often misunderstood, overlooked, and undiagnosed. If you’ve spent years wondering why staying organised, focused, or emotionally regulated feels harder for you than others, it’s not your fault.

Understanding how ADHD manifests in women can be the first step toward self-acceptance and getting the support you deserve.

Women and ADHD Masking

Due to gender norms and expectations in society, many women learn to mask their ADHD related struggles in order to meet societal expectations of being organised, empathetic, and “together.” This can delay diagnosis and lead to internalised feelings of failure or inadequacy.

The negative consequences of missed diagnosis are far-reaching, impacting on school and work performance, self-esteem, mental health, and relationships. Research suggests that boys with ADHD may present with more “externalising” symptoms, whereas girls with ADHD present with more “internalising” symptoms, such as depression, low self-esteem or inattentive symptoms.

This might partly explain why historically more boys have been diagnosed historically - externalising symptom may be more likely to be noticed and result in assessment and eventually diagnosis

The Emotional Burden of Undiagnosed ADHD In Women

Women are often diagnosed with ADHD later in life, and this can mean that they’ve had years - sometimes decades - without support or understanding of their condition. time. The negative consequences of missed diagnosis can impact almost every area of life and include:

Low Self-Esteem

Women with undiagnosed ADHD may internalise their struggles as personal failures, describing themselves as “lazy” or “stupid.” This self-blame can significantly affect their self-worth.

Mental Health Struggles

Co morbid conditions such as anxiety, depression, and perfectionism are common in women with ADHD. Many seek treatment for these issues without realising that ADHD is at the root of their struggles.

Relationship Challenges

ADHD symptoms can lead to difficulties in maintaining friendships, family relationships, and romantic partnerships. Feelings of being misunderstood or “different” often start in childhood and persist into adulthood.

The Potential Benefits of An Adult Diagnosis of ADHD

  • Increased Self-Acceptance

After an adult ADHD diagnosis, women often experience relief and increased self-acceptance. For many women, receiving an ADHD diagnosis is a transformative moment—a chance to understand their past and approach their future with more clarity and self-compassion. :

  • Validation of your lifelong struggles

Receiving a diagnosis can be an extremely validating experience. It help women to reframe their past experiences or perceived ‘failures’ in a new light. This can help to heal the impact of years of shame and self-blame, and women may develop increased self-acceptance and self-worth as a result of this new perspective.

  • Improved Emotional Regulation

With a clearer understanding of ADHD, women can develop strategies to better manage emotions, reduce overwhelm, and communicate their needs and differences effectively. This can have a transformative effect at home, work and in relationships.

  • Increased Self-Awareness & Opportunities

Being neurodiverse in a world designed for the neurotypical is stressful. An ADHD diagnosis allows women to identify their strengths alongside their challenges, empowering them to pursue meaningful personal and professional goals and to create a life that feels authentic and fulfilling.

Get the Clarity You Need Today

If you suspect ADHD may be affecting your life, an assessment could be the key to unlocking greater self-awareness and support. Dr Lorna Otway-Kerr specialises in understanding how ADHD manifests in women, providing compassionate and comprehensive assessments entirely online.

A Psychologist & Clinic You Can Trust

  • Expert-led Assessment ✓

    Assessments are conducted by an experienced Clinical Psychologist specialising in adult ADHD.

  • Confidential & Convenient ✓

    All of our appointments are conducted securely online, for your convenience and privacy.

  • Clarity & Insight ✓

    From the initial screening to your detailed report, we ensure you leave with greater clarity and insight.

Book Your ADHD Assessment

You don’t have to navigate this alone. Start your journey to clarity and self-acceptance today.